I am driving an automobile at a moderate speed through a town. It is a sunny day and the economy is bad and Michael Jackson has recently passed away and the world is left with only a Beatles’ rhythm section. The automobile is a 2009 Chevrolet Cobalt, unassuming and not at all intimidating, but with a decent factory stereo and iPod functionality.

A teenager jaywalks approximately fifty yards ahead. He stares at my windshield and seems angry. He walks very slowly across the road. Very slowly, indeed. Staring all the while. It is an act of defiance. It is fresh nihilism, quiet and assured and with peppery notes, like a Cabernet Franc i had once. Or p(e)r(h)aps the teenager is fed up with the situation in Urumqi. I remove my foot from the accelerator of the automobile and apply pressure to the brake. The car slows. The intention is to avoid a collision with the teenager. When a car collides with a teenager, it is typical for the teenager to exhibit considerable wounds and abrasions, and it is typical for the driver to experience a high level of litigation and/or paperwork. These conditions are to be avoided. This avoidance is an accepted societal norm.

The act of defiance succeeds in slowing progress of the automobile and its driver towards their intended destination. The teenager reaches the opposite curb, but subsequent observation of the teenager shows no celebratory gestures, such as fist-pumping or even a smile. The teenager does not seem satisfied with the victory. The reasons for the dissatisfaction are unknown.

In the spare time i have during the event, i ponder this particular act of defiance. When did it start? From the first days of automobile / pedestrian interaction? At some later, more significant event in history where these interactions encountered an environmental change? Did it start in 1966, like all of the other aberrant behaviors? Does it occur less when larger vehicles are involved, or smaller teenagers? I feel like a scientist, and turn down my stereo to allow more questions.

What is this particular act of defiance even called? Does it have a name? I do not think that it does.

I roll down my window and ask the teenager.

“What was that called?”

“Fuck you!”

For lack of something better, i will call it ‘tarduspedestion’ for now. It is latin and has lots of syllables, so it will do, at least temporarily.

Proceeding to my destination, i envision a young Visigoth in ancient Europe. He is tarduspedestioning in front of an angry Roman senator in a chariot, on his way home with a freshly baked loaf of bread. Oh! Is it an act of defiance specifically targeting the elite?

I wish that i had a freshly baked loaf of bread.