this will seem either wrong or right, being within the confines of christmastime and all that, but i have to say that i am sick of christians.

so sick of christians.

it has taken awhile. i was so tolerant for so long. i really do have near-infinite patience.

but now i am outwardly sick and tired of christians, and i will call on my god, Agnost, to rend christianity asunder. as asunder as paganism, yo.

christians are so whiny and terrible these days. christians are always complaining that they are being oppressed. or something. christians have such victim complexes. christians are so effort-intensive to get along with anymore. it’s ridiculous. it really is.

lately, christians are victims of signs. signs at shopping stores, like wal-mart, or l.l. bean, maybe. the signs hang menacingly from the rafters of the stores, and push their will onto christians as they walk into the store to buy things for their holy-day celibration.

the signs have the gall to say “happy holidays”, or something equally satanic.

christians are not putting up with it anymore. christians are fighting back against the signs and their cruel messages.

the christians are revolting. the christians are even revolting against seemingly “politically correct” people, who have dared to vocalize the exact messages which the evil signs have managed to brainwash into the heads of the citizenry. the christians would rather have no tidings, than good tidings which are not nearly specific enough to be of their liking.

i am so sick of christians.

so tired of christians.

hey christians, if you are so hellbent on having signs say “merry christmas”, then by all means, buy a fucking wal-mart and go for it.

don’t get me wrong. i think jesus was probably aaight. taking the dude as a person, separating him from the whole of the godawful religion he has inadvertently spawned, he was like this wandering hippy who was pretty cool. i think i would have gotten along with jesus. but who can’t get along with a lovechild hippy? if you can’t get along with a lvoechild hippy, there is something seriously wrong with your attitude.

but as right as jesus might have been, christianity is all wrong. i am so sick of christianity.

i am not sorry about the heathens stealing christmas. christians stole christmas from pagans, so it’s already a tainted holiday. why should heathens feel guilty? according to christians, heathens are going to burn in a godless hell, anyways. y’know, fuck it.

then there is evolution, and how christians are under the impression that biology teachers actually give lessons on evolution in high school (they don’t!), and how equal time should be given to “intelligent design”, because maybe it is God, and not mutations of ever-changing RNA, who is responsible for viruses which obliterate millions of innocents over the course of a century.

how fucking intelligent is THAT design??

and even though the united states of america is not supposed to be recognizing any one religion over the others, laws are being passed to teach christian-backed subjects.

does this mean that we have to consult with islam, hinduism and judaism, and all the rest, and get their suggestions on high school curriculum as well?

that’s alright. state-funded public schools can push math and grammar off to the side. the kids weren’t really paying much attention, anyway. let’s just concentrate on the sciences, as read by our beloved organized religions. brilliant. everyone is fed up with science being correct all of the time, right?

i am so sick of christians.

here is a better idea – a private christian school?

you’re welcome.

oh, and pat freaking robertson?

someone should definitely assassinate him.

preferably jesus.

with a rambo knife.

the serrated side.

so sick of pat robertson.

a religion built on humble suffering, and not a one seems to suffer humbly.

even with the mode of trauma being one of their pathetic feelings. you know, rather than a huge somewhat blunt rusty iron spike through your hands and kankles. your big, fat, american kankles.

and forgiveness? that cornerstone of the religion? back in the one and two hundreds?

what happened to that ideal?

was it replaced with that… umm.. eagerness to judge?

so sick of christians.

and fundamentalists! augh! so sick of fundamentalists!

man, i’ve been waiting so patiently for the sunset of organized religion, giving way to the calm twilight of enlightened culture… i am sick of waiting! i have waited at least ten years!

it is all taking too long!

anyway, so yeah.

i am sick of christians.

excepting the christians i know personally, i guess. i mean, i wouldn’t want to piss anyone off, or anything.

now i am going to go and take advantage of your holiday.

seasons greetings!

-tim.

Tonite we went to a party after working. Dave is the guy I work with now, and we hired on in the same little group. I like Dave, because he is very New Jersey, and he has his ways, and he has a different spin on bitching and complaining, which we all love to do.

Tonite I am pretty sure that Dave fucked some girl in the bathroom. I am very sure that he made out with her with tongues after their first twenty minute conversation, because that part was right in front of me.

The other part was when she went into the bathroom, and then he needed to go to the bathroom, and he waited at the door for five minutes, and then he stopped waiting and opened the door and went into the bathroom and closed the door behind him, and then they were both in the bathroom, and this status did not change, for literally 25 minutes, which might be impressive.

It was all very surreal.

I am not sure how those things happen, because I have not been blessed with charms, looks, or forthrightness. You know, the necessities of the new masculine millenium. (It’s a gas. )

Usually I have not gone to parties. I bet this is only the fourth party I have ever been to. It’s kind of pathetic that there have only been three or four, and I have already lost count.

I am not so social, but it’s aight. Sometimes I have good one-liners. That is what the people like.

Anyway, so it was a Christmas party, and people were drinking and it was pretty tame, except for Dave and this other girl, who took the opportunity to have all-of-a-sudden sex.

I have never had eggnog. I had some at this party. I enjoyed it a lot.

Also, the meatballs were good.

I turned down two games of poker. Others of us watched people try to play GTA. Sometimes it was amusing.

I am sleepy, and worn from the alcohol, which I am seeming tolerant of.

There is rarely enough for a full paragraph.

there is a mystery i have been investigating and it is a secret, i am not telling anyone the abouts, not writing down the observations, and there is no evidence, only insinuances, something about half-lives, like radioactivity, deadly chemistry that is vitalic while it is harmful, carbon-12 getting tired and stale and yellow, bones in cushions, taking little sleeps, more and more often, skirting the mysteries for a moment of peacefulness, and blank of remembrances,

and when i investigate blank remembrances, there is that film of dust, like set upon a table of decades, missing the chair where kids would sit and contemplate their fingernails, but only when they were told to.

do you know how plastic gets brittle after nineteen years?

so do senses. because they become less vocalic.

like, if you retrieved your water pistol from 1986, and you went to the tap, and you filled it up with water, not too hot and not too cold, but just above lukewarm, and you inserted the little plunger, then you turned to face your enemies and you fired, then the water pistol would form shards, in the compression between the padding of your palm and your pointer finger pulling the trigger, would simply shatter and fall to pieces,

after years of service and friendship, your water pistol has let you down, left you exposed, left you undefended, now feeling the great surge of water at your ribcage, no match for the supersoaker of the new millenium, you are inhaling without breathing, collapsing backwards against the kitchen counter, toes sliding forwards into the little broken plastic pieces of what used to be your most trusted childhood weapon, little plastic shards spinning in place on the ceramic tiles.

plus, you are wearing a white shirt, so everyone can see your nips. that’s the way it goes.

what were we about?

I have been making Wikipedia my bitch, lately, which is slang that means I have been taking advantage of it a whole lot.

A lot of times I will watch television and sit at the computer, and if the television says something interesting, then I will find out more with Wikipedia.

A lot of times, I will find things on Wikipedia that cause me to look at other things on Wikipedia, which cause me to look at even other things on Wikipedia. This means I am learning and “surfing” simultaneouslatthesametimely.

Here is a list of things that I have looked up on Wikipedia in the last few weeks: (It is not a complete list) ::

- Milleniums, or millenia, for short, from the 10th BC to the “11th and beyond”.
- Alexandria, Egypt
- Asexuality
- Atanarjuat
- Baldwin IV of Jerusalem
- Carl Sagan
- Cashew
- Cassini
- Chernobyl
- Christopher McCandless
- (All Geologic Eras, from Hadean/Cryptic to Phanerozoic/Cenozoic)
- Dave Chappelle
- Distant Early Warning Line
- Flight 19
- Gas Turbine
- George Westinghouse
- Gravity
- Guelph
- Highways in Nunavut
- Hypatia
- Imhotep
- Impact Event
- Jericho
- Joaquin Phoenix
- June Carter Cash
- Justine Bateman
- Moon
- Mount Ararat
- Nikola Tesla
- Pangaea
- Pannotia
- Paul Pena
- Permian-Triassic Extinction Event
- Pitcairn
- Qatar
- Red Paint People
- Rodinia
- Saladin
- Scheherazade
- Speed of Gravity
- Sun Ra
- Syphilis
- Tina Yothers
- Ulysses
- Vangelis

I apparently watch a lot of the Science Channel. And have an interest in the lost talent of Family Ties.

Today was going to be monotonous, but ultimately it was not, because, first thing after getting to the office this morning, there was a voicemail, and the woman was from human resources, and she said that I seem to be what they are looking for, in this other position, you see, the one up north, the one I applied to so that I could leave Florida behind, one year is enough thanks, my
life as a arthritic frog, in a dry deep ditch, so anyway would I like to do an interview?

Yes, I would!

The situation would be like:

1. I leave Orlando. This is the best part. Because I have no friends here, only gin & tonics.

2. I work in Hamilton, Ontario for one to two years, until I am smart about my new product line. This means that I would be able to live somewhere in Lake Ontario’s elbow, maybe between Saint Catherines and Southwestern Toronto. I could ejaculate on this prospect, because I love Toronto. Although I think I like it best as a visitor, and would like to return to a just-big-town. Guelph would be killer, but it may be too far. I am getting ahead of myself. Although I have begun to listen to Glenn Gould. In anticipation. Oh, Canada. I have always felt that I have been exactly what you’ve been needing.

2a. Hamilton is also an easy drive to where my folks’ and grandmother are, if I want to.

2b. Also, Rochester.

3. After the one or two years, if the Canadian girls will allow it, after such a tease, then I pull up my roots, and migrate to Trenton, New Jersey.

3a. South Jersey is not disgusting, because it is where Princeton tends to be. South Jersey means closer proximity to friends and sibling families. Proximity is an important thing, I think, even if it is not utilized as much as it could be.

This all depends on whether the interview goes well. But what other applicant is a proven success within the company, and willing to spend two years among the discarded old automobile tires of Hamilton, and settle down maybe eventually in the state of New Jersey??

Just me, I bet.

Perpetual change keeps me from being stolid.

Also, my new boss is a dick. This was the spark, or butt-prod, if you will, that I had been in need of.

I have never had a boss who was a dick. Out of maybe ten or twelve bosses.

I should tell you about my bosses, someday. You, meaning you.