Anyway

'How wonderful to be so profound!
When everything you are is dying underground.'

--

I don't know why, but there is a movie from 1975 called Picnic at Hanging Rock which has me completely spooked. I watched most of the film last week and its presence lingers in uneasy ways. It is about a group of schoolgirls who are choked with Victorian morality and then they go on a picnic by a small mountain which is a surreal lava formation. Some of the girls disappear for no good reason, and they never come back. There are no scenes of violence, no blood, no particularly scary parts. But on the whole it was unbelievably eerie. It is an eerie that lingers for days.

I think the secret is that the mystery is never solved, and you suspect unbelievably weird and supernatural and sinister causes but they are nothing more than faint notions, because you are given nothing to grab onto with your logicalstilts. Another secret is how the disappearing girls seem to be secretly possessed, in a secret frame of mind, whispering a cryptic script, which is secret. So cryptic.

I don't know if i will ever be able to fully trust geology again. How powerful films are.

--

I've transitioned directly from flu to cold. I feel like i will be full of viruses from now on, forever.

I have a whooping cough or tuberculosis.

I have thirty-eight days or perhaps a little more before i will be doing something else with my life, i wish i knew what it was. I am taking some vacation days on account of the necessary research, and on account of my questionable sanity and salinity.

Circulared means crimson circles.