Katana & Wakizashi

This past weekend, I decided to try something:

For as long as I can remember, I have had this large device in my kitchen. It is rectangular and white, and it has doors, and on the inside it resembles a cabinet, but it is quite chilled within, and when the doors are kept closed, I would imagine that the temperature becomes uniformly chill, perhaps to around 40 degrees.

So on Sunday, I quit eluding the grocery store, and instead I entered, and I made substantial purchases, including an array of items which would most certainly perish in a matter of days (nay, hours!) without the inclusion of a proper chill environment.

Do you see where I'm going with this?

Once home, I placed the chill items in the chill cabinet, and they have been prospering ever since. I cannot find the words to express my delight! Finally, my diet can extend beyond restaurants (fastfood) and canned goods!

Or, this facetiousness could have also gone like this:

I was finally able to overcome my habit of never ever buying milk or vegetables or other perishables for fear of being sent somewhere far away soon afterwards.

I guess that means I have confidence in my situation.

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With my new inventory of fresh vegetables, I cooked stir-fry last night. And watched a dvd I had rented called "The Last Samurai". I was not having a themed evening. My intentions with the stir-fry meal were completely independent of my watching of the movie.

Anyway, I will assume that the actual last samurai in the movie was not Tom Cruise's character, because that would be complete horseshit. Which means that, since this is hollywood, Tom Cruise was yes probably intended to be the last samurai.

But I will assume that the last samurai was the more obvious Japanese guy with the sword. And, my friends, it turns out that the Last Samurai's last words were in a language called English. Fancy that, old chap. You spend your lifetime specializing in your native tongue, only to favor some bastardized secondary language for your last few sentences ever. What a sham(e).

Also funny, was the meeting of leaders before the last battle, on the plains of Japan, a battle between New Japan and Old Japan, which would finally decide the direction that the evolving country would go.

And then the fucking terms were given by the American, in Engrish, saying "The Empire of Japan demands that you blah blah blah..." Shouldn't the Japanese guy be giving the terms?! In Japanese?! Considering the battle is By and For Japan??

But Horrywood, we are just dumb American audience. Prease do not confound us with re-ar-ity. Er.. re-al-ity.

Arso, not so good at reading rittle words at bottom of screen. Prease minimize text!

Lordy.

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One last thing:

I have good news. I just found out that I can save a lot of money on car insurance by switching to Geico.

No, seriously.

I've been getting hammed.